The Nectar of the Bean

Regulars here at (both of you) should be well aware of our fondness for tea. It has had no less than two entries on its lonesome and various other mentions throughout. So, one could be forgiven for thinking that this trend did not apply to other hot beverages. In actual fact, there is another hot drink which surpasses tea in so much as how much we like it. Can you guess what it might be? Two uni students and a teacher?

Yes, its coffee. Gad AND/OR zooks! How we love our coffee! We always have four varieties, which can be made up on one of our five machines. We drink it any time of the day or night. We just can’t get enough of the nectar of the bean.

Here’s our inventory:

  • Dan’s expensive stuff

  • The decaf for late night jaunts

  • Tom’s cheap stuff

  • The instant stuff (a necessary evil)

And the machines:

  • A kettle

  • A plunger

  • A drip style percolator

  • A large stove-top espresso pot

  • A small stove-top espresso pot

  • A cheap Breville Espresso/Cappuccino machine

At present the drip-style percolator is broken, (thanks to my putting the hot jug under a cold tap). A tragedy, yes, but one that opened the doors of opportunity in this place. The plunger, which had hitherto only been used once or twice got its chance to shine. And struth, how it shone. I had never really gotten into plunger coffee before – my own loss. Perhaps I wasn’t making it properly. And so, by way of a warning to others, I will finish off with instructions on how to make a perfect cup of plunger coffee.

1. Firstly, boil you jug. Then let it sit. We want the temp to cool down to around ninety degrees celcius (-173º F).

2. Meanwhilst, warm up your pot. Rinse it out with the quasi-boiling water.

3. Put your coffee in. A heaped tablespoon per cup is a good guide.

4. Pour the water over the coffee and stand for 3-4 minutes (The plunger, that is. You can sit down if you want.)

5. Gently lower the plunger. If all was done properly, you should get a nice layer of crema on the surface.

6. Serve as per how you like it.

Now Dan likes to put the milk in first. In coffee speak, this is what we call post-lactum coffee. You can also have pre-lactum coffee and, I suppose, simultaneous-lactum coffee as well, if you were that fussy. Personally, I think the whole thing is just silly and pedantic. Like when people insist that you stir the sugar in a clockwise direction, or squeeze the toothpaste tube from the end, or spell yogurt with an “h”, or fail you on your driving test because you didn’t give the person in the next lane an opportunity to merge into your lane even though it was perfectly obvious that she was turning into a side street anyway. But I digress.

Plunger coffee has more caffeine than espresso-made coffee (except decaf) because the caffeine needs longer contact with the water to come out. I think there’s something in that for all of us.

Good night.


4 thoughts on “The Nectar of the Bean”

  1. I’m guessing maybe someone is a little bitter and twisted about a certain driving test?!? ;)Well, I don’t really have anything constructive or interesting to say, but I felt the need to leave you a comment to just mention 2 things…..1) Nicole and I can count at least 6 regulars to your site, so none of this ‘both of you’ business!2) While I agree with most of your comments, yes, yoghurt needs an h, call me pedantic if you want to ……. (I wouldn’t go so far as to have sugar-stirring habits though)!Anyways, I shall stop procrastinating and go do something useful!!Cheers,Susan


  2. My coffee-drinking days began as a child in Taree. In those days, instant coffee was the standard brew and there was really no concept of the actual bean and apparently no correlation between the two. By the HSC I was ploughing through at least six cups of this vile concoction every day, and as study tapered off I started hitting the cafes for my fix. Well, I can now say I’ve become somewhat of a lower-class upper-snob pressurised coffee afficionado. It’s not something I’m particularly proud or ashamed of, it’s just the way it is. On the crazy chance that I’m in someone’s house and the “Anyone want a tea or a coffee?” is systematically aired, I will systematically refuse based on my lack of faith in this stranger’s ability to satisfy my requirements. There are a bunch of other important points to be made (re: technique, brand quality and the like), but the idea of me expanding them here and now is nearly as ludicrous as me swallowing one of those yuppie “bath bomb” contraptions with a view to making my farts both more frequent and also refreshingly fragrant.


  3. Dear SGR Boys,Yesterday I got hit on the head when a cup fell on my head. I got a lump the size of a cup on my head. Now my head is ok.Love,Little Timmy


  4. dear SGR, i’d like to say that i love yer site and have since it’s apparition earlier this year. i’ve only just gathered up enough courage to place a comment, but i love reading such funny, witty and true writings. anyway… i love coffee, though i can’t drink it after dinner cause it makes me sleep bad and dream weird dreams lots. but i love it in the day. especially on days off, which is kinda kwirky (*i also agree that padantik peopel who complaine cauese things a’rent spelled good annoy me azwell*) cause one would generally associate coaffee with tiredness and tryin to get worked up to doing work, but i like it as a break and sipping device on a day off while readin a mag or a book in the hammock out the back (hypothettically if you have one or 2 or 3).i love your work, keep it up!rolf 🙂


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